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4 Ways You’re Enabling Your Loved One

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4 Ways You’re Enabling Your Loved One

As parents or spouses, we will do almost anything to support our loved ones. When it comes to a loved one who is dealing with addiction, enabling behaviors can do more harm than good. Offering positive responses to negative actions may seem like a hopeful way of dealing with a significant problem. The fact is, you are only making the situation worse and can actually harm your loved one by enabling their addiction. Family therapy is one way you can help correct the situation. If you or someone you love is battling an addiction, finding a men’s addiction treatment program like Red Oak Recovery® can help. Contact our team today at 866.457.7590 to learn more.

Financial Support

Knowing that your loved one has a problem with drugs or alcohol can be hard to face. The behaviors they exhibit can be unpleasant and disrespectful. You can often tell when they are out of their drug or alcohol of choice by how they act. When they come to you asking for money to pay for a necessity or to buy food, you give it to them even though you know they will spend the money elsewhere. To stop the enabling behavior, stop giving them cash. Instead of money, choose to provide them with food or offer to fund an addiction treatment program.

Allowing Dangerous Behaviors

Drug abuse in any form is dangerous. Looking past these behaviors and acting like they don’t exist will allow your loved one to continue to use drugs or alcohol without any consequences from those they love. Overlooking these behaviors may give your loved one the impression that you don’t care. Turning a blind eye is an enabling behavior that may cause your loved one to lose more than just money. They can end up losing their job, their family, and, at worst, their life. Instead of allowing dangerous behaviors, set limits on what you will allow in your presence and your home.

Explaining Away Poor Behavior

One of the most common enabling behaviors is trying to explain away your loved ones’ behavior. Calling your loved one’s place of employment to report that they are ill and can’t come to work is one of many tactics that your loved one may use. Many parents also try to explain away poor school performance, damaged property, misplaced items. However, in most cases, they know full well that their loved ones’ addiction is the primary cause. Instead of making excuses for your loved ones, force them to be accountable. By attending family therapy sessions, you will be able to find ways to cope with the addiction and hold your loved ones responsible for their own actions.

Taking Accountability for Their Actions

One of the hardest things for someone who is dealing with addiction to do is be accountable. It is much easier to blame others for their problems. This allows them to do their drugs and drink their alcohol without feeling guilty or ashamed. Many individuals who are addicted to drugs or alcohol feel guilty about their addiction but are not mentally prepared to seek treatment or be accountable for their actions. While enabling behaviors need to stop, there is only one way a person dealing with addiction can get back on track. They have to want it. If any rehab is going to work, your loved one has to make an active choice to get sober.

Get Treatment at Red Oak Recovery®

When you begin to realize that you are enabling your loved one, it’s time to start thinking about treatment. Contact Red Oak Recovery® at 866.457.7590 to find out your options. Family therapy may be the best way to proceed so that you all get the counseling and treatment you need to get back on the road to sobriety.